The Perfect Song

It's probably one of the hardest things to find. There are so many factors to consider for so many different reasons. Of course, sometimes the song doesn't even exist, so you have to settle for the "next best" song, which ultimately leaves you dissatisfied with the lack of perfection. Sure, if you had the ability, you could probably correct this problem on your own, issue over. But for those like me, who only dream of possessing musical talents, this isn't exactly easily accomplished. Of course there are times when the perfect song is right in front of you. That just makes things super easy. I wonder what early humans did to find the perfect song. They probably wrote some amazing tribal stuff.

In other news, I want this, and anyone who doesn't is probably evil and you should avoid them at all costs. Amazing DVD that I MUST own!

Like a Really Good Movie, For Your Tummy

So last night I finally ate at Bare Burger in Astoria, which opened it's doors earlier this summer. For those who don't know, Bare Burger is a little burger restaurant that features all organic stuff. You know, the kind of hippie food where you don't feel like a total fruit-cake eating there (but you can if you want to...they have salads). Unlike the usual burger joint which usually doesn't offer too much of a burger meat selection, Bare offers not just a high-quality beef burger as well as the typical Turkey, Grilled Chicken, Veggie, and Portabella fare, but also Ostrich, Bison, Elk and Lamb (for an extra $1 or $2)! Totally worth it! sadly, they don't offer bear, but those selections are still pretty awesome. You order by picking one of 7 varieties of preparation, and then your choice of meat and bun (or if you are "watching yourself" you can go for a wrap or just over lettuce). Their french fries are friend in peanut oil and are offered with a variety of unique and awesome dipping sauces (the Orange and Ginger mayo is Asiantastic). Sadly, they don't have a liquor license yet, so don't go there expecting a perfect beer and burger combo, but they have Boylan's soda on tap and supposedly amazing milk shakes (didn't try because I didn't want to overwhelm myself on the first outing). There is no doubt in my mind that I will be going back to try everything, and I might even stop by for a weekend breakfast.

Hooray for Astoria!

Things to Watch

Hey guys, as you all know, I am a modern day Chance the Gardener, and I like to watch. So here are some things I have watched as of late:

Where The Wild Things Are (the movie):
Ok, so I have a theory that if you didn't read this book (or have it read to you) as a child, then you are either really old, OR one of the saddest people ever. And as someone who loved this book just as much as anyone else, I too had many a childhood fantasy about being my own Max and escaping into a world of monsters who worship me as a king. The iconic art work (which, an interesting side note, the Wild Things were originally designed as horses, but Maurice Sendak's publisher said his horse drawings sucked and he should just make them monsters. I guess that's a win for the publishers) and imagery has stayed with me my entire life, and I remember looking at those pages more than I remember the book I read this morning on the subway.

That being said, I wanted to see the movie as much as I didn't want to see it. After all, Hollywood has a history of embracing my childhood loves (Spider-Man, Wolverine, Curious George, The Transformers, GI Joe, Garfield, etc etc), and more often than not, destroying them into horrible dribble which make me curse the fact that I ever loved these things in the first place. So hearing that Spike Jonze was at the helm, with Dave Eggers assisting the screenplay, my hopes were more positive. Upon seeing the movie, all I can say is wow. For the most part they held true to what they could from the book, and the story they added to it (because seriously, you can't expect a a 13 page book to really stretch into a 100 minute movie) just made sense. Of course what probably appealed to me most was the fact that Jonze insisted on using Muppets to play the creatures, using practical effects whenever possible, and CG only when appropriate (the detail in the facial movements was flawless). I think when directors go the CG route in creature effects, they forget that what kind of effect that can have on the viewer. If I didn't know any better, I'd say those Wild Things were real, and it allowed me to escape into Max's imaginary world in a way that not even the book can accomplish.

So, if you loved the book, and have a child-like sense of whimsy, go see this movie. If you are a curmudgeon, go back to yelling at those kids to stop making so much noise while you are trying to watch Bill O'Reilly.

Modern Family (on ABC):
If you are not watching this show, stop whatever you are doing (including reading this blog) and go watch it on ABC.com RIGHT NOW! Go ahead, I'll wait right here. Done yet? Are your eyes to blurry from laughing tears? Ok, take a minute and go dry your eyes. See? Funny, right? It's by FAR the best new show on television and one of the best comedies to come out in years. It not only uses the single camera comedy theme (which I now declare is the better way to make a funny show), but it also provides us with characters who are incredibly fleshed out and work well together. It's the first "family sitcom" that I have enjoyed since I was just a boy in a family, instead of a man-boy who is still in a family but doesn't live in a family home despite the fact that his brother is one of his roommates. Seriously, it's worth the 30 minutes (22 if you dvr it), and you have no excuse not to watch.

Zombieland:
Ok, so it's not too much of a secret that I have an irrational fear of zombies. Irrational because zombies, as far as we know, are not real...yet. If they were real, I think my fear will only aid my survival, since I have made myself watch enough movies that I know the things to do, and not to do, in Zombie situations. Zombieland, thankfully, is not so much a "scary" zombie movie as it is a funny comedy taking place in a world of zombies. Even if you have a low tolerance for fear, you still might enjoy this movie. Unless you hate comedy. Then you should probably go back to yelling at those kids.

Flash Forward (on ABC):
Ok, so the premise of this show is "simple," everyone on earth blacks out at the same time and has a look into the future for two and a half minutes, then wake up to the massive chaos of a world where everyone blacked out for two and a half minutes (vehicles crash, planes crash, trains crash, people drown, etc etc). The future they all look forward to is April 24, 2010 (conveniently at season finale time, surprised no one flash forwarded to spoiling how Lost was going to end). The first episode hooked me in pretty well, being full of chaos and conspiracy and everything that could hold my attention for an hour (or 44 minutes on a dvr). But as the series progresses, I can't get over the fact that I seem to be less and less interested in what is going on. Maybe the characters just aren't in it enough for me, or maybe it's that they are trying too hard to replace Lost, or maybe it's simply the fact that we have seen the future, and I have issues with fighting the future and escaping fates, etc. I don't know, I'll still watch it, give the season a chance, but I am not holding out much hope. It just better get awesome, or I'm out.

The Invention of Lying:
I love Ricky Gervais. I think his written comedy is fantastic, and he is a very funny actor (his stand up is not so great, but his other stuff is good enough that it doesn't matter). This is a perfect Ricky movie. It has a fantastic cast, and a great story (and even a little religion bashing, and who doesn't love that?). It will probably be out of theaters soon, so if you don't get out to see it, make sure you rent it when you can. You will most likely like it.

Improvodox:
This is a Jewish improv and sketch troupe which I am now a proud member of. We don't have any shows scheduled any time soon, but keep your eyes open here and facebook and twitter and everywhere else for whenever we do.

A Hypothetical Question, From a Friend

A friend of mine from college, Dom, posted this interesting hypothetical on his blog, and I thought it would be worth sharing with my readers, and something really interesting to ponder all day and then have nightmares about.

Somehow someone produced two unauthorized movies about your life.

The first is an independent documentary. The documentary features vignettes of you going about your life completely unaware of the camera crew that must've been hiding in the bushes (or as the bushes) in order to procure this footage. It also includes uncomfortably honest interviews with all your family, friends, and enemies.

The Second movie is a major motion picture from Hollywood. It has all the people you would have suspected playing you and all of your friends and family. Critics and audiences alike find they like the film and it has both a 91% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes and has a 9 star rating on IMDB.

Which film are you more interested in watching?

Me personally, I can't decide. On one hand, if the Hollywood movie is THAT good, I'd obviously want to see that. On the other hand, I would have trouble rationalizing knowing that this honest information out there from my friends and family and NOT ever hearing it for myself. especially if that documentary is also seen by many people.

Right Over My Head

So you ever see a movie as a kid, and then not see it for a while, then see it as an adult and be totally blown away that not only did you have NO idea what the movie was really about, but why your parents even let you see it in the first place? My favorite example of this is the movie "Radio Flyer" starring Tom Hanks and Elijah Wood and the kid from Jurassic Park.

I am sure most of us saw this movie when it first came out, or on TV shortly there after. When I was a kid, I saw the movie a few times, mostly because I liked that I also had a red Radio Flyer wagon growing up, and I liked the fact that these kids were acting out their dreams of building a functioning flying machine, as well as their dreams of creating magic potions. And that's all that movie was to me, two brothers who had a dog and a giant turtle who wanted to see Buffalo, make magic potions out of turtle poop, and build a fully functioning aircraft out of a little red wagon, despite being no older than 10 or 11 or whatever and having no real knowledge of aerodynamics, or any physics. PLus there was a weird guy with a limp at a gas station. That was all there was to it, making it an over-all happy movie, despite the dog being badly injured at some point (although never remembered/understood why).

Then I grew up. At some point the movie was on TV, and I said "hey 'Radio Flyer'! I haven't seen that in years and I remember enjoying it a lot. I think I will watch it and enjoy the innocent themes the movie projects." It was about 5 minutes in that I started to wonder what was wrong with me as a child. Did you know that the movie in question is about child/domestic abuse? And not just neglect, but flat out horrible beatings by a drunk father who is in and out of prison. Seriously. That's what it's about, and that's why the kids try to build a plane and why they try to create magic and hide electric chords in the oven, and fantasize about giant talking buffalo. I was blown away. How is it possible that such horrible acts could escape me through the course of the ENTIRE MOVIE ON MULTIPLE VIEWINGS!? It's weird how kids can willingly ignore such things when they are unfamiliar with such themes.

Another movie that may shock you is Labrynth. Did you realize that that's all about puppy mills?